Written by: Michelle Belanger
Feeding with Hands | Give and Take - Excercise | Feeding Techniques and Contact Points | Stealing Breath
Feeding with Hands
Feeding with the hands is recommended if you and your partner are not exactly intimate or if there is some desire on both of your parts to not mix feeding with more physical intimacies. Feeding through the medium of the hands, while it allows direct physical contact, gives both giver and taker a sense of physical distance that a direct mouth-contact feeding cannot really provide. However, it must be kept in mind that regardless how chaste or distant the feeding may be on the physical level, feeding itself is a very spiritually intimate act, and the spiritual and emotional intimacy of feeding cannot be removed from the act no matter what methods you attempt. With this in mind, if you are accustomed to long-distant feeding or ambient and surface feeding only, you will find that nothing quite compares to the efficiency and satisfaction of a one-on-one physical contact feed. This is true especially because of the level of spiritual and emotional intimacy that it achieves, for it is through a physical contact feed that deep feeding can occur, which is a process in which the most intimate parts of each person's energies come into contact with one another and are for a moment shared.
There are any number of suitable contact points for feeding with the hands. Generally, the major chakras present the easiest access to the other person's energy. For a relatively casual style, you can try this seated position, which is a good introductory position for feeding, especially if one or the other partner is not really accustomed to this level of interaction or is still getting comfortable with the process of feeding:
The taker should sit on the edge of a couch or a chair. The giver should sit on the floor in front of them, as if they were going to receive a back rub or neck rub from the taker. Both individuals should make themselves as comfortable as possible.
Once both are comfortable, the taker should bring energy into his hands. Most of us develop our own methods of visualization for this, but a quick and effective method that's been used in China for hundreds of years is to clap the hands and then rub them together vigorously. (If you've seen the Karate Kid, this will remind you of something Mr. Miyagi did at the climax of the movie -- that's because he used Reiki to heal Daniel at the tournament.)
Once the taker feels he's ready, he should place one or both hands upon the neck of the giver. The best placement is for the hands to be on either side of the throat, with the fingers laid upon points down along the carotid artery (through which you'll feel the strongest pulse) and the thumbs placed in the hollow either behind the jaw or behind the ears -- whichever is most comfortable for the shape and span of the hands and also whichever position seems to offer the strongest connection to the giver's energy.
Some time should be spent simply connecting to the giver's energy at this point. The taker should feel the pulse, but also try to feel deeper, to the energy beyond that basic rhythm. For my part, i close my eyes and use the pulse as a focus to dive into the other person's energy. There is a sense of going deeper -- not just with the contact of my hands, but with my whole self. The hands, like the pulse, become just another focusing tool.
There will be a point where a kind of equilibrium can be felt -- the giver's energy has reached out to that of the taker in response to the contact, and the taker's energy has "entered" into that of the giver. At this point, the taker should begin actively to feed.
The feeding is accomplished again through visualization, but also through a marriage of several focusing tools. The pulse is the most obvious anchor the taker has to the giver's life-force. The points of contact along the neck offer a focusing point for where the taker can envision the energy exiting the giver and entering themselves. And the process of drawing this energy out is focused through the breath.
When I do this, my eyes are closed, and I focus on the glow I see before me once I've made contact with the giver's energy. I reach part of myself out to it, and as I do so, i exhale very gently. Then as I inhale, I also feel myself breathing in the energy of the other person. Some of this actually enters me with the breath, but a great deal also gathers around my fingertips and is pulled up toward my center through my hands.
It is not uncommon for the hands of the taker, and also the points of contact, to grow very warm as the energy is connected with and the process of taking it begins. On the giver's end of things, while this heat may be experienced, there is also often a sensation of cold.
The feeding will not be accomplished in one or two breaths, but should be drawn out for ten or fifteen minutes at least. The taker should not attempt to exert so much force when taking that all of the energy he needs is pulled out all at once. This is detrimental to both giver and taker. Instead, the process should have a rhythm to it, a rise and fall that the taker will begin to sense if they have connected properly to the other person's energy.
If the feeding is drawn out over time, this also enables the taker to establish a progressively deeper and deeper connection, so that the energy being taken comes from a more profound source within the giver and is of a much higher and more satisfying quality.
It is not uncommon for both the taker and the giver to enter into an altered state of consciousness during this process. It is not uncommon to feel as if the body has slipped away and both taker and giver are beings of spirit or energy that are interacting in such a way that their energy or spirits combine or merge. The visualization may give way to actual visionary experiences, the most common of which is a perception of lights of varying colors and intensities.
A certain amount of empathic or even telepathic connection between taker and giver should also be expected during the process of feeding, for the taker does not only take, but also must put forth some of his own energy into that of the giver in order to pull what he needs forth. This inevitably creates a cycle between taker and giver, and through this cycling of energy, things are exchanged between the two. This is the main reason that regardless of how physically distant the two parties involved may try to be, a certain level of intimacy is unavoidable. Giver and taker are relating to one another on the level of energy and pure spirit, and each comes away with a deeper experience of the other if the feeding has worked at all.
Other Contact Points
In addition to connecting at the neck, the taker may also establish a decent connection by laying the hands over the heart chakra of the giver. This is in the middle of the chest, between the breasts. The second hand can be placed at the throat, or, depending on how both individuals are situated, upon the corresponding part of the heart chakra on the back.
For a very casual-contact feed -- really the least intimate of any that actually involve physical contact -- the giver and taker may seat themselves opposite one another and extend their hands. The taker takes the giver's hands in his own and establishes points of contact either by placing his palms over the giver's palms and laying his fingers along the energy channels that go up from the wrists (once again, located in close proximity to the artery from which you can feel the pulse of the wrist) or can place his palms over the base of the giver's wrists and simply use the energy channels as his major points of contact. Either way is acceptable, and it is very likely that the giver's pulse will rise to the perception of the taker from either position.
From these further positions, the rest of the process is identical -- the taker establishes a connection between himself and the giver. Some time is devoted to allowing the energies of both parties to synch up and become open to one another. Then the taker extends his perception and some of his energy into the energy of the giver and initiates the cycle, focused through breathing and visualization techniques, of drawing energy off from the giver and into himself.
Give and Take - Exercise
For this exercise you'll need a partner. It should be somebody you don't have a problem sharing energy with. Your partner should also be comfortable sharing energy with you.
You and your partner should sit in a comfortable position facing each other. Remove any jewelry from your hands and wrists -- bracelets, watches, rings.
Take a moment to center yourselves. Hold your own hands together for a few moments, focusing energy into them. You may want to rub them together to get the circulation flowing and flex your fingers to get any stiffness out.
Now hold your hands out to your partner. Hold your right hand palm down and your left hand palm up. Have your partner do the same, arranging things so your hands are over one another, just a few inches apart. You right hand should be underneath his left and your left hand should be above his right.
First just try to feel the energy between your hands. You may have to experiment with positioning, moving your hands closer or farther apart, depending on how strong the energy is.
Now focus on starting a conscious energy exchange. Give with your right hand to your partner's left hand, and take from your partner's right hand with your left.
How does this feel? While you are experimenting with the energy exchange, feedback with your partner. Can either of you really feel the pull of the other? Can either of you really feel the other pushing out energy? Does one of you seem to have a stronger draw for pulling energy than the other? Does one of you seem to be more skilled in giving the energy?
How does this compare to your sense of your own skills? Do you feel that you are more of a giver than a receiver where energy is concerned? Does your strength in either giving or taking seem to back this up? Have your partner tell you what it feels like to have the energy taken, and try describing your sensation to him. You may want to take a few moments to allow one of you to just take so you can better analyze this sensation. After a few moments, switch so the other person is taking for a while as well.
After you have experimented for a while giving with your right and taking with your left, switch hands. Take with your right now and give with your left. You may also want to switch the way you're holding your hands when you do this, as it's easier for the energy to flow down than up.
Did you notice a change in how strong or how weak the energy pull was depending on the positioning of your hands? When you were just taking, how easy was it to maintain that kind of draw with one hand in a taking position but the other in a giving position? Did you find you had to switch your hands so both were taking or move the other hands apart so you wouldn't complete the circuit by giving as well?
In most systems, the right hand is known as the "giving hand". This is supposedly the hand you use to give out energy. In the same systems, the left hand is the taking hand.
Does this system seem to hold true for you? If you are left-handed, does it alter which hand you seem to be good at taking energy with? Experiment taking energy with both your left and your right hands. Which seems to be dominant for this purpose? If one hands seems stronger at taking energy, is the other hand better at giving it or are they both about the same?
Compare your observations with your partner. Ask him which of your hands seems stronger when taking and which seems stronger when giving. Feedback to him as well. When you are satisfied with the exercise, thank your partner for his participation. Move a little apart from one another and hold your hands together for a little while, concentrating on just your energy. If you feel a little strange from all the energy exchange, take a moment to ground, touching your hands to the floor and letting the excess energy flow out into the earth.
Feeding Techniques and Contact Points
The preferred and most effective method of feeding is direct personal contact. This of course presumes that you have someone who is willing to play the part of donor for you, and who has no issue with you coming into close physical contact with them. Not all of us are so lucky as to have an individual who is both aware of what we are and willing to serve in the capacity for us. In such cases, one must make do with long-distance feeding, surface feeding, and ambient feeds.
For now, let me explain in detail how one can best approach the matter of contact feeding.
The best contact for feeding is made with your hands or with your mouth. as anyone who is familiar with techniques like Reiki or Healing Touch, the hands are a major center for energy work, and they can both give as well as take energy from others. The mouth most of us stumble upon as a focal point long before we are even conscious of what we are doing. there are two reasons the mouth is so effective for feeding. First, of course, the energy rides upon the breath. A good deal of breathing and breath control comes into play when feeding, even when the main medium of contact is the hands.
Secondly, of course, is the symbolism of the mouth. Not only is this where we take in life-sustaining breath, but it is also the part of our body that takes in more physical sustenance, such as food and drink. I could segue into the whole psychology of orality, but the basic thing to know is that on a deep psychological and physiological level, we associate the mouth with taking things in. Thus it serves as a perfect focus for the in-take of energy.
Now, knowing that you can take energy in with either your mouth or your hands will not help much if you don't know the best places on the other person's body with which to initiate an effective point of contact. A point of contact is a physical position where it is relatively easy to bridge the gap between the physical and subtle bodies of a person. The most obvious points of contact occur upon the chakras. These are the most significant and hardest to miss junctures between physical and subtle bodies. However, other points of contact exist along the various energy channels running along the arms and legs, various points along the torso, and of course the neck.
A number of Eastern texts can be consulted for more information about energy channels, also called meridians in Taoist literature. These can give you an idea of where to look for good points of contact, but since everyone's body is slightly different -- not only in subtle physiology but in basic physical size and shape -- the placement of the meridians and other energy channels will vary from person to person. And so any work you might consult can only serve as a guideline, and the best method of locating these points is simply with hands-on experience where you feel along the general areas on a person's body where such points should be and let your own subtle senses guide you to the proper point.
Stealing the Breath
This is a technique that I thought only I did, but when discussion about feeding came up, I learned that several other people used it as well. Apparently, it's a pretty common method of feeding, although it really can only be done with an intimate partner.
Here's what you do: you and your partner start off by kissing. I'll leave the details of that up to you. However, when you get to that point in things where it's really intense and you are kissing with open mouths, pull away for just a second. Your partner's mouth should be open a little. Tease it open with your finger or with your tongue if you have to. Then get so close that you are almost touching her mouth with your lips.
Open your own mouth and breathe in her life. This should not be a shallow breath but that deep controlled inhalation used for feeding.
Draw in energy through her open mouth. Of course, get on with the kiss once you get a good draw. You can easily kiss a little, then feed a little more, drawing the session out as long as your partner is still interested in kissing.
I don't recommend doing this with your mouths locked together, although it's still possible to do. It's just that you'll really be sucking her breath out of her in that case, and that's not what you're trying to do. Focus on the energy and let it ride upon the breath.
Presumably you are doing this with a willing partner, but if it is absolutely impossible for you to find someone who can willingly provide energy to you, this is a technique that is easily masked as simple lovemaking, and if you take in many little bursts interspersed throughout the kissing, you'll be able to get what you need without alerting your partner to what you're doing.